today, because i am so immersed in the love and joy i have for my little son, i am overwhelmed by grief for my three lost children.
or maybe it is because i miss my three never-met babies so much today, i am marvelously, vividly aware of the love and joy i am basking in with my tiny laughing living son.
the tears might be happy and the tears might be sad. i'm don't even know myself, but i also don't much care. this is rich, deep, real life, and i choose to grow.